The bait and switch is the emotional hook to get me to chase the new topic. For example, when someone starts a calm conversation or makes a sudden false accusation (the bait) only to change the subject the moment you defend yourself (the switch). How do I spot it? You bring up a real concern about their behavior, and they instantly attack your tone, bring up a mistake you made years ago, or accuse you of doing the exact same thing.

How do I know if I have taken the bait? If you suddenly find yourself scrambling to prove your innocence instead of discussing the original issue, you have taken the bait. PLEASE NOTE: Sometimes the bait is a sudden apology, a compliment, or playing the victim so you will drop your guard and forget the boundary you just set. *****Always Look for A Fake Vulnerability*****

Here are a few calm, one-sentence responses  that I use, that you can also use depending on how they try to switch the topic:

• When they deflect with a false accusation: "I am not going to defend myself against that, so let's stay focused on the issue I just brought up."
• When they bring up the past to distract you: "That is a separate topic for another time, and right now we are talking about what happened today."
• When they attack your tone instead of addressing the problem: "My tone is not the issue here, and I would like to stick to the original conversation."
• When they refuse to stay on topic after you redirect them: "Since we cannot stay on the subject, I am going to step away from this conversation now."

LETS PRAY